Last Post – 144 months and 1 week


I am writing this to thank all of you. Thank you so much for following along this journey. I’ve been lucky, not many diagnosed with breast cancer and reoccurrence live as long as I did. Some only get months. For me, it was years.

It was trips to Europe. It was a writing career. It was becoming a podcaster. It was buying a car. It was watching my husband thrive in his work. It was paddling the waters early morning in Balaton. It was cottaging with my family, and playing games like Telestration. It was meeting all your babies! It was working at the library and seeing how they support so many. It was landing a dream job with Amnesty International, which justified how following your joys can actually lead to concrete ‘grown up’ good things. It was family reunions and cousins and aunts and uncles. It was buying a couch! It was facing fears. It was Claire Never Ending.

It was time with my Dad (wow we are so alike). It was time with my Mom (and shows we watched, the comfort we shared, the support you gave). It was time with Daniel (the car rides!). It was time with JP (the kindness and love). It was time with Catherine (the tea we drank!). It was my fellow writers, Ulrike, James and Kate (and how we believe in each other). It was meeting Kevin. It was time with my long-time friends, seeing how they’ve grown, and Christmas’ Eve Eve.

It was Zsolt. It has always been Zsolt. Everything, every second, instant, thought, laugh, cry, comfort. The way he smiles when he walks into the room. How his face changes when he thinks. His wonderful height, and how I can cuddle up into his arms. How much we have in common. How much we love each other. How you are my very very very best friend.

And it was all of you too, who wrote to me in the comment sections or read along quietly. You made the hard days easier, and my random thought experiments acceptable. It was fun to write with you. I’m grateful to know you were all out there, and in some ways my words left an impact. That was your gift to me.

Thank you.

I’ve been lucky. I got to have so much. I got to have you.

This life has truly been a win.

35 thoughts on “Last Post – 144 months and 1 week

  1. Catherine. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I have have so loved reading your adventures. Thank you for sharing your stories with us xx

  2. Catherine, thank you for sharing your story, for being brave in the face of illness and showing us an elegant side to this illness. Thank you for allowing us to tag along on your journey. ❤️

  3. You are a such beautiful person. I have learned so much from you and will think of you and your outlook often. Sending you and your family love and light.

  4. Sending you love and letting you know how much it has meant to me to have found you in this strange new world we now inhabit. (I’ve been, until now, one of your quiet readers.). You’ve shown me how to be brave and to ‘carry on,’ but not just carry on, to also live out my dreams. (i wish i knew how to make a heart with the keyboard… i don’t, so here’s: ) xxoo

  5. Bless you Catherine. Your love story enthralled me, and the love just seem to keep growing. You’re such a wonderful story teller and your story will stay with me forever. Sending you my love, Kerry in London

  6. I read the message of catherine, the best of my niece Catherine. I am french speaking. Je suis touchee par les messages de votre fille Catherine . ELle est partie hier en pm et quelle peine vous devez avoir!!! Mais quelle belle personne elle etait. Pouvoir lire ses reflexions a ete un privilege pour moi . Je veux offir mes sympathies à son mari, ses parents et aussi à ma niece Catherine

  7. We are the ones who should be thanking you. Well, at least I know I should be. You are an inspiration. I have been reading your blog for many of those 144 months. Battled my own health wars and post traumatic stress in the midst of it all. Your blog has been a beacon of light as you set the bar to just keep dreams moving forward no matter what. Claire Never Ending is just one example in many. I will miss you my virtual friend. Wish you God’s speed as your journey beyond this realm beckons. Hugs to Zsolt, your parents, brother and friends. You should be proud, you’ve lived this life well.

  8. You are an amazing spirit! You zest for life is a treasure.. You appreciate life so much! Thank you for sharing your thoughts for so many years… Your journey is only begininning..

  9. Dear Catherine, I came to your blog really late. I was clueless about your blog… yiur writing touches me. Really. There is a joy and light that I see when I read your words. Thank you for bringing light into our lives. 🙂

  10. Hello catherine I’ve followed you since I was diagnosed with triple negative BC in July 2011 and came across your blog – you were one year ahead of me and it helped enormously to know you were out there going through this too. I followed all your further diagnosis too. I’m older than you and live in London and know you’re a bit of an Anglophile so that was a connection too.

    I deliberately didn’t do any blogging about my BC experiences (even though I am a writer of sorts – an academic); I didn’t think I could do the experience justice so I take my proverbial hat off to you for doing this and helping all of us similarly going through this shitty experience too. It made it that bit less lonely.

    You’re a marvellous role model in how to live life to the full. I’ve read and re-read your blogs and followed along and cried and cheered you on but you didn’t know that as I didn’t leave any comments before. So here I am now – letting you know that all these words have meant something and have helped and made connections.

    Thank you! You are an inspiration to me.

    Best wishes for you in your journey from across the Pond

  11. Thank you Catherine , for sharing your journey however difficult it was at times. Know that someone out there was reading, and finding strength and spirit, and hoping and praying for you. Your kindness, strength, love , warmth and optimism were always shining through in each post. Sending you a hugs and good vibes a little way west of Ottawa.

  12. I’ve been dreading this day. Catherine and I go back many years in the blogosphere together. She has been an integral part of our community – one of the most gifted writers and talented women I’ve ever known. Most of all her love for Zsolt shone through everything she wrote and did. My heart aches for her loved ones left behind. We’ve lost a shining light and our world is so much poorer for it.

  13. Bless you sweet lady. I don’t know you and this is the first post I’ve read. I would have liked to have known you.

  14. Catherine, I feel honoured to know you. You are wise beyond your years, a great writer, an artist, a lover of life, and a blessing to Zsolt, your dad and mom, JP and Daniel. You have made a beautiful imprint on this Earth, in this universe and in our hearts.

    I treasure the short story you wrote for me, “A Gift for Tomorrow,” featuring Mummykins and her five cats. It has been a gift for me for every day, and will be for days to come. Its magical wisdom pierces my heart, and I plan to heed to the advice provided therein.

    And I will print and frame your “blue whale with the red kite” digital painting located somewhere in your “BumpyBoobs” because it reminds me of joy, creativity and innocence … wonderful feelings that your art has inspired in me.

    With all my love, Francoise.

  15. Pingback: Weekly Round Up: In Memory of Those We Have Loved and Lost | Journeying Beyond Breast Cancer

  16. I am so sorry to hear that Catherine has passed away, and at such a young age. I only knew her briefly as I passed on my job as Book Club Co-ordinator at Amnesty to her, but as a member of the club, I saw what a great job she did. My sympathies to her husband, family and friends who have lost such a dynamic and courageous young woman.

  17. Pingback: Gone from Metastatic Breast Cancer: Catherine | Rethink Breast Cancer

  18. Pingback: Gone from Metastatic Breast Cancer: Catherine – Breast Cancer Survivors Network

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