Category Archives: Love

Wonderful to each other

Posted in After treatment, Bumpboobs, Love by

“This is your time. This time we are for you.” Last year around this time, that was my French Canadian grandmother of ninety-one years, Lulu, cheering me onward as we spoke over skype (as I  tried to look ‘healthy’ with my bald head and worn out expression, since no one wants to look sick in front of their grandmother). She sent her support, like everyone else – and I was so incredibly thankful. ‘People are at their best during the worst’, I heard that the other day on Lost (I think), and during my worst, people were truly incredible.

And last year I thought to myself while pre-made food arrived, as friends visited, when family called from across the ocean and coached me via skype, I thought to myself, “once I’m all better, I’ve got to give back.”

The number of ways to ‘give back’ are endless, from blogging to volunteering to donating to running  marathons. . . possibilities stretch before a thankful survivor who needs to honour the goodness they’ve experienced. But I hadn’t imagined giving back would start so close to home, so close in the family.

This week Zsolt and I are thick in the woods of the Mount Tremblant area, hanging out at my aunt’s cottage and keeping her and my grandmother company. Now, one year later, this is Lulu’s time, and this time we are for her. While I haven’t written a single word of fiction (or fact, apart from this blog) during this mountain retreat, I have cooked some lovely meals, watched my husband stoke the fire, enjoyed driving tours with my aunt, played rummy with family, listened to my grandmother’s memories of her parents (and her parent’s parents, and her aunt, who was a nun) . . . and I am reminded that sometimes the best way to help another person is simply to be available.

Being here. Cooking food. Listening to stories. Going for a latte.

Last year those were the little things that made an incredible difference in my fight, and this year – though the circumstances are completely different (though the exhaustion isn’t, I can imagine) – these are the same things that helps everyone smile. And when we’re smiling, all else moves aside like sunshine through clouds. A generous reminder that life can be wonderful, and we can be wonderful to one another.

Enjoying the view of home

Posted in Canada, Finding Home, Life, Love, Travel by

This week I receive two emails of Canadiana (sp?) from some lovely ladies who read this blog – seems that the “Canadian Living” post inspired a little bit of Canada reminiscing. From ‘land of the silver birch, home of the beaver’ to reddening maples, sugar shacks, beavertails, loons across the water, cottage days, and even to the sharp dip in September weather; it was pleasing to see that our stories (Zsolt and I combined) touched a chord.  

On my desk in my new office is a painting by a fantastic local artist (who also happens to be the mother of a very good friend). I love her work – her paintings can bring me the chill of a winter morning, the damp of a rocky shore, the electric humidity before a storm, or the ripples of water as you dip your paddle for another push . . . talk about your touch of Canada, if I can write it – she can paint it.

And even better (if you want to get away from the arts) have been the walks. Everyday Zsolt and I go for a walk. He’s trying to learn Kanata so that he doesn’t repeat his ‘one hour walk’ that occurred the year we were married. Zsolt, Anna and Laszlo (his folks) set out for a walk on lovely May morning and didn’t come home for ages. Why? Because they were lost in Kanata. . .wandering street to street, trying to decipher one bungalow from another.

So he’s learning. And I’m enjoying all the green. For all the cookie cutter formulas and expectation in terms of lifestyle – the suburbs most certainly have greenery covered. From the gardens, the trees, the sports fields, and the micro forests . . . I love green.

The painting on my desk depicts an autumn day. It reminds me of walking through Gatineau park – you know the walk circling that deep, narrow lake? (If you even live in Ottawa or Canada, that is . . . and if you don’t, you are probably gagging right now on all this talk of Canada this and Canada that. My apologies.) It reminds me that soon the leaves will turn and another season will arrive. Already the temperature is dropping, and already I’ve stepped on a few crunchy leaves.

All this to say, I love our Canadian landscape. Europe’s got class. The world is an oyster. But oh, Canada, you are beautiful.

(Just don’t ask me to exude so much love come next January – cause by then I think I’ll have had enough of the darkness and ice . . . but for the moment, we’re in a very good place.)

🙂

Quick aside: My energy has been rather low lately; even these leisurely walks are tiring. Maybe it’s the settling in, the jetlag, or my little ‘vacation’ from taking vitamins . . . whatever it is, I’m knackered – and that isn’t cool. This is a problem to be solved asap. Though it could just be the travelling . . .it always gets me.

Another quick aside: Today I was stung by a wasp. What the frack! There I was, hanging out by Young’s Pond – and BAM – pain! Thankfully I’m not allergic, only offended. Stupid wasp.

Causing other people pain

Posted in Canada, Finding Home, Life, Love by

Alright – here it is. I am packing, things are being packed, the packing is nearly complete. Who knew an entire room full of stuff could fit into two suitcases? Well, now I know. The bigger question at this moment (after combining my room of stuff and two suitcases with Zsolt’s one suitcase and carry on) is how are we going to fit it all into the car?

One of life’s fun challenges.

Another fun challenge? Heat waves. Today I think it might push forty degrees here in Pecs. That is hot. For this little Canadian who likes her summers humid and near thirty and her winters cold and below zero . . . 40+ degrees is absurd. Absurd. Absurd!

Yesterday I was like a tired dog on the doorstep: sprawled out and panting. Today, I’m expecting a similar activity come three or four in the afternoon.

And between the packing and the sweat – there has been a lovely parade of family gatherings this week here in Pecs. You know what, if you ever feel like your social life is lagging – just move! Move and the whole world will erupt with plans for a visit. It’s a bit bittersweet because yes, for sure you want to see all these people. They are your people. They’re worth more than gold. But the clock is ticking and the paperwork for immigration isn’t finished and the luggage weighs too much and you still need to clean the apartment before moving out . . .

But the grandmothers and Zsolt’s aunt came over for lunch yesterday. Only for a couple hours since no one could stand being too social in this heat. It was nice. Oh my goodness, one of these days I’ll have to write about Zsolt’s grandmother and his aunt (mother and daughter). Together they are a team – like a comedy team. Not intentionally funny,  but with their bluntness and their humour and their age and they way his grandmother laughs herself into tears . . . really, you would like them. I like them.

So the grandmothers came over for lunch. We had BBQ chicken (in Hungary, BBQ means an electric Teflon grill . . . but hey, they’re trying) and beautiful salads and potatoes and rice followed by ice cream. Everything was going so nicely until they all started crying.

Sometimes I feel like a vixen who has knocked Zsolt on his head with a love-hammer and stolen him from his family. And I wonder if they feel the same about me (though they love me very much, that’s so very clear. And I love them too . . . but I just can’t help but wonder. . . hmm, maybe my parents secretly feel the same about Zsolt. You know before I went to Europe and met Zsolt for the first time, my dad said to me, “Catherine, don’t go falling in love with any boys over there.” And I was like, “Duh, Dad. That would be stupid.” ) Growing up can have its fair share of tricky decisions. But it’s also full of freedom to choose and opportunities to grow. Life takes us forward. Zsolt is my forward.

So there was a round of crying. I guess that’s fairly normal (it’s normal in Canada too – mostly between me and my mom), particularly after having spent such a long time here this summer and it really feeling like we’ve been living  in Hungary rather than visiting.

Anyhow, it just reminds me that Saturday will be one heck of a day. We’ll have to rip off the Band-Aid, and no one looks forward to that moment.

Speaking of Saturday – here is the plan so you can follow along (yeah, right) as we head toward the New World.

Saturday:

Go to Balaton for lunch with Zsolt’s sis and bro-in-law.

Go to Austria and check into the flight.

Fly to Brussels. Spend the night.

Sunday:

Get to the airport and check into the flight.

Fly, fly, fly to Montreal.

Do the immigration dance.

Head over to the Cottage and catch up with my family for the next week.

Nice, eh. It will be great. Just need to get over the hurdle of saying goodbye. And need to live through the next couple days of extreme freaking heat. Oy!

And that is that. Now I need to go and melt into a puddle. Have a lovely day 😉