Category Archives: Life

A great storyteller: Kate Matthews

Posted in After treatment, Bumpboobs, Fun, Novels and Stories, Treatment, Writing by

I’ve been a big fan of author and cartoonist Kate Matthews for some time now, following her hilarious posts on facebook and sharing them with the online Bumpyboobs and Facing Cancer Together communities – so when I saw she was offering up a free ebook for whoever could guess what was in this picture, I jumped on the opportunity.

Like, I literally jumped. I was all, “OH! OH!” and somersaulted to my personal Bumpyboobs facebook account to give my response. And, high-five everyone, it was totally correct.

That’s how I connected with Kate beyond just the Facebook fandom. She sent me a copy of her ebook, the Little Pink Book of (mostly) Cancer Cartoons and I had a hoot flipping through the e-pages and enjoying her witty take on breast cancer diagnosis, treatment, coping, relationships, LIFE, etc.

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She gets it, you know? She really gets it. From booby heaven, hair loss replacement options (i.e. silly string), things people say, mastectomy, lymphedema, pink suffocation, and trying to feel normal. She gets it, and she made me laugh. What a beautiful combination. 🙂

But then Kate wrote me and offered to send along (in hardcopy – woohoo!) her other book, the Little Green Book of (Mostly) Happy Household Cartoons, with an ebook version to wet my appetite  – and I realized she doesn’t just get it, she really gets it.

It’s a pleasure to flip through the normal-day-and-life cartoons Kate has created alongside and after the breast cancer diagnosis. Life goes on, and yes we can be haunted by the circumstances, by NED wire walking, by the worry . . . but life goes on, and the little things are so wonderful. My life with Zsolt has me laughing daily, and Kate’s life reflected in her cartoons reminds me of those family moments, those lazy moments, those ridiculous moments (I’m thinking cockroaches here, though she just has spiders), that make each day so lovely.

And you know what the incredible thing is? Kate admits that before she started the cartoons, she couldn’t draw. Okay, so the women and men of the Little Books aren’t Disney-animation perfect, but they’re almost better for that lack of perfection. Life isn’t perfect, we are not perfect . . . but expressing your story despite all that is pretty darn awesome.

Anyhow, I just read her “Adam/Even and the apple full of antioxidants” comic and it got a burst of laughter. So, because I really believe in creativity and quality, and I love to support a fellow writer – if you are looking for a charming book this Christmas, whether you’re stocking a reader, tablet, find a book to hold, or just treating yourself, please do consider checking out Kate Matthews. She’ll have you laughing through cancer (a freaking miracle suitable to the time of year), and she’ll have you laughing through real & wonderfully normal life.

Now if you’ll excuse me. I think I’ll go back to my reading, and my giggling. Happy holidays everyone!

Little Pink Book of (mostly) Cancer Cartoons (Hard Copy) (Kindle)

Little Green Book of (Mostly) Happy Household Cartoons (Hard Copy) (Kindle)

P.S. I did get some free book bling, but I’ve been a fan of Kate for ages. And I’m not making anything from the Amazon links. She’s just a great cartoonist! Oh, and she’s on facebook if you’d like to follow.

Five Little Thoughts on Random Life

Posted in Finding Home, Food, Life, Travel by

Here is what I’m thinking about today:

I am thinking about Jasper, Alberta and a small bit of pathway that winds behind some of the homes of the tiny town. We’re walk along this black path at night after the bars closed, (we as in me and my friends, we were Tram Kids – working for the summer at the Jasper Tramway) on the way back to the giant house where many of us lived. It was completely unlit, and I’d have to trust my memory of having walked that path a hundred times before during the day as we took the shortcut to our home.

Jasper, just so you know, is a town inside of a National Park. That means animals cannot be hunted here, and it’s perfectly normal for elk to roam around the streets and chew on people’s lawns. It’s also not unheard of for other wild animals to find their way into the suburban streets, parks and pathways. A small part of me always wondered if there was a bear in the shadows as I walked back home, though a larger part of me just wanted to go to bed.

Anyhow one night as we were coming home, we stopped in this black pathway area and lay on the ground. All of us were tired, sweaty from dancing and high on being young. But, knowing there were meant to be shooting stars, we lay on the grass beside the path and looked up into space – big, black, never-ending space. One after another we spotted shooting stars, clusters of shooting stars, herds of shooting stars. If there was ever a night to make a wish, that had to be it. I cannot remember what I might have wanted, but I think on that evening with my friends on the damp grass along the path,  I had pretty much everything I could ever wish for.

. . .

Except for Zsolt, but I didn’t know to wish for him back then. And that’s another story.

*

I am thinking about how difficult it must be for small businesses, particularly restaurants that can’t afford to set up in the trendier parts of town. There are some really nice, cheap and cheerful venues around Vanier – unexpected compositions of flavour at reasonable prices. And yet the seats are empty. This afternoon I attempted to go to Golden India for their lunch buffed having heard their food is excellent but the restaurant is struggling, and somehow instead ended up at a place called El Tucan, which was also rather nice. The food was comforting, and the atmosphere had  South American flare thanks to the 70s South American film playing over the speakers and on the television by the bar, and a lovely lady . . . possibly from El Salvador (just a guess since the restaurant had Salvadorian food), helping us with our meal choices. It wasn’t as cheap as the Snack Shack, but she was most certainly cheerful.

These little places have so much heart poured into them. It must take heaps of courage to start a restaurant and say: “I don’t care about the failure rate for restaurants, I’m starting up (insert restaurant name here) and it’s going to be incredible!”

A highlight of this particular restaurant, apart from their really yummy spicy jalapeno sauce, were the drinks. I had a cashew nut fruit drink, which started off nutty and then switched to floral sweetness. Zsolt had a sweet and sour drink, which (can you guess?) started off sweet and then moved to sour. We were impressed.

After the meal we walked just a little bit along Montreal road and looked through the windows of all the small restaurants. So many small restaurants, so much competition, and so many empty seats. . .

*

I am thinking that grammar is one tricky b*ch. There are so many rules, and it changes depending upon location and organization . . . Zsolt and I keep getting into confusing disagreements whenever he asks me the random English language question. Like why are ‘pants’ considered plural? How do you shorten a quote? Is it that or which? And you know what – I hardly ever know the correct answer.

Forget the MLA handbook or Harvard guide to whatever. Lately I go to TheOatmeal.com or the Grammarist, or just plain GOOGLE the phrase to see the debate of its usage. And there’s always debate. I know of only one woman in this entire world who may have a handle on all these rules, but she’s particularly brilliant with this stuff and far above normal human capacity regarding theory around language. She’s like the Super Woman of Grammar.

*

I am thinking we don’t have enough candles. The lights just flickered here in Ottawa; we have a total of one Glade scented candle, and I’m guessing its little light wouldn’t be enough to sustain us for an evening. Hmm. Isn’t that doom day soon approaching? But then, what good would a few candles do if the whole world went kaput?

*

I am thinking that I need to make dinner, and yet have no clue what to serve. This is a daily occurrence. 😉

P.S. TONIGHT is PRIDE AND PREJUDICE at the NAC. Awesomeness wrapped in petticoats!

How to STAND OUT during chemo and beyond

Posted in After treatment, Bumpboobs, Chemotherapy, Fun by

I don’t know why I’m writing about this today, except that last week I met and chatted with a women who is going through chemotherapy. We met in a coffee shop, and while it’s clear from our chatting that there is much going on with treatment and life, I couldn’t stop thinking how lovely she was looking; she undoubtedly stood out from the coffee shop crowd, and it was largely because she choose to be striking with her clothes and makeup alongside with her bald head.

All of this made me think back in time, as I realised, “Geez, like this beautiful lady (she has a name, I’m just not using it here), I really stood out after chemo with the bald-to-short hair.” Which led to other thoughts like, “Should I cut my hair short again?” (NO!) “Didn’t I promise myself to be fabulous ever moment possible once my body had recovered?” (YES!) “Maybe I should write a post about standing out.” (Which I’m doing right now.)

Here’s the thing about chemotherapy – it knocks you on your ass. And frankly, if you decide to leave your home, which is rather inevitable during treatments, you will attract attention even if you’d rather be invisible to the world.

Let me say it again. You will attract attention.

And after treatment there’s still months upon months of very short hair. Once again, you will attract attention.

But is that a bad thing? If you are going to stand out, then why not do it on your own terms? And hey, why not use the months following chemo as a practise trial for standing out for the rest of your life? Let it be a warm-up for becoming a spectacular presence in your everyday life – a unique energy people can’t help noticing.

Personally, this is a big challenge for me since I grew up being the too-tall-for-the-boys constant wall flower. But the more I try with things like pink glasses, big blue rain boots, funky jackets, pretty clothes, blond highlights to come . . . the easier it becomes. No joke, practice makes this easier, and really satisfying too. Every wall flower wants to be noticed.

Therefore, I present to you, with an invitation to add your own ideas in the comments: Five ideas for standing out during chemo (i.e. whenever you can manage the energy) and beyond!

1. Find some beautiful accessories, e.g. scarves, bracelets, statement necklaces, earrings. Remember, scarves are not exclusively for your head – these can be worn around your neck as well. The lady in the coffee shop wore a beautiful combination of a pale pink scarf wound around a gold thread scarf. The result was so complimentary, I just kept looking at it and thinking how pretty she looked.

2. Smile at people. If they are going to be looking at you, look back at them. Smile, nod, say hello. I’m not saying you need to stop and converse with everyone about cancer or whatever else is on your mind that day, but smiling makes you instantly more relatable. It’s the universal ‘hello’ and everyone is better looking with a smile on their face.

3. Invest in an interesting and impeccably flattering piece of clothing, make it different from the crowd . . . you could snap up something from a local designer, or search a vintage shop for some old-time charm. If you don’t have the energy to shop, no worries – just keep a general eye out, and in the meanwhile look for daring pieces in your closet you’ve never had the guts to wear before this moment in life. (But obviously wanted to, cause how did it end up there otherwise?) Maybe it’s a jacket that’s tailored to your curves, maybe it’s an asymmetrical dress or shirt – I don’t know. All I know is it should be well made and different from anything else you’ve been seeing on the streets.

4. Embrace the short hair . . . at least for a while. I had mixed feelings about my short hair, but while it was there – I tried to style the blond curls (throw-back to my baby hair) sky high like Kramer from Seinfeld. Why not? Having pixie short hair is such a unique experience, and it instantly marks you from the crowd as a daring individual. Instead of hating the hair – love every second of your re-growth, from punk-rocker shaved to Natalie Portman sweet. . . you will stand out with that short hair, so make the most of the experience.  (Speaking of which, I really need to get some highlights put in. I’m aching to go BLOND again!)

5.Embrace colour. Please resist the urge to hide behind black or grey on a daily basis. Okay, I agree that black and muted tones can be very flattering . . . but if you want to be striking, find colour that flatters your skin tones. Couple darker tones (if that’s your comfort zone) with pops of coral, strong blue, light pink, oranges & reds with with blueish tones, green or yellow. Combine those colours with your statement piece, and lady, you’ll be smoking hot – and not because of the menopause!

I have this blue jacket that I wear whenever the weather allows . . . it’s cut quite uniquely, has polka dots and is rather flattering. People say to me often enough, “oh, you’re the girl in the polka dot jacket. I’ve seen you before!” You bet your ass they have. Chances are they’ve seen a lot of people before, but not everyone stands out.

You are fantastic, you are alive, you are YOU. So I reckon take the attention and twist it in your favour. Everyone deserves attention, why not use now to practise how to be present and seen? It’ll get you off to a running start for all those lovely and healthy days to follow treatment.

And that’s my two cents about that!

Catherine