Okay š I have a smile on my face because todayās post is about NOTHING important. You know how lovely it is, I assume, to think about unimportant things as opposed to those scary-oh-shit-this-isnāt-happening-itās-all-a-dream sorta stuff. None of that today.
Instead this is about hair. Not the loss of hair, but the growth!
Christmas 2010 ā sooo long ago, yet very vivid in my memory, I was cracking jokes about reverse balding as my monk-like hairdo slowly began to spread in wisps of light brown hair over my bare head.Ā It was almost worse than being bald, because bald can be sexy, cool, edgy, hip . . . but random wisps around my crown with a bald patch on the top is not sexy. I covered my head more in those days than when my scalp was completely bare.
Christmas 2011 ā not soo long ago, but a bit of a memory by now. The hair had grown back across my head, and while it was about an inch, it was cute. Downside was that I had a massive V-shaped hairline, exactly like my brotherās, and it wasnā exactly feminie. But the hair was coming. . . ohhh baby, it was coming!
Spring 2012 ā I shake my head and bangs fall before my eyes, over my eyes, hanging all the way down BELOW my eyes. HAIR. HAIR. HAIR. Beautiful, glorious hair. No matter that it flipps out to the sides like some Archie Comic character. No matter! Itās hair!
And I predict that by Christmas of 2012, this stuff may just be styled into a proper bob. It may even have BLOND HIGHLIGHTS.
Okay, Iām abusing the use of capital letters. Okay, Iāll stop. BLOND HIGHLIGHTS!!!! Okay, Iām done.
[Zsolt just came upstairs and massaged my shoulders. . . oh my goodness. Every home should have a Zsolt.]
Anyhow, itās still a little strange and crazy, but itās coming in. No way do I look bald, and it took about two or three months after treatment for it to fully grow in and cover the head. Short hair looks gorgeous on women, by the way, and I truly believe each and every one of us can rock this look.
Sometimes I look at women who are 2 or 3 years out of treatment, and I literally ogle their hair. Ā Itās almost hard to focus on their conversation. (Is this how men feel about breasts? No wonder they get distracted.) For some reason, the importance of hair is so deeply ingrained into us. Itās associated with health, with femininity, with sexuality, with glossiness and ā really, itās deeply linked to identity.
And honestly, Iām almost kinda nervous to grow it out into a bob, to dye it blond again, to go back to that look I had before chemotherapy (though I love that look). . . I guess Iām a little afraid Iāll lose it all over again. But I canāt be afraid of things just because they were associated with cancer. Canāt abide with the fear.
My wedding anniversary is upcoming. I will be excited for it. I will not freak out that Iāve got an oncologist appointment right around the same time (this is where the important stuff starts creeping into the conversation, and I promised not to go there today ā so it stops here.).
Blond is good. Hair is good. And sweetness of all sweetness, itās finally coming back.



