This past weekend my parents ran their annual ‘Wake up’ seminar – so that meant they were crazy busy and we didn’t talk on Sunday. Didn’t talk on Sunday, and it wasn’t till late Monday that we actually met up on Skype.
Somewhere between Sunday morning and Monday night I realize the following: I’m hooked on talking with my parents.
I kept checking skype for that little green bubble to appear beside their names – over and over, compulsively.
It never used to be like this. There was a time that we’d go a week or two between conversations – I was busy, they were busy, no one had time. But then I was diagnosed with breast cancer and that all changed. We talk every day, either working together on my issues or just chatting. Even though they are in another country I still feel their support. Actually, I depend on it.
Who knows what will happen when the chemo and radiotherapy is over. Chances are we won’t chat every day. I’ll be busy, they’ll be busy, there won’t always be time. But this has been a very good experience. In some ways it brought me closer to my parents, and I’m really thankful for that.
It’s a heavy thing to take care of someone, but it makes a difference. From Zsolt doing the dishes, to friends bringing food, to talking with my parents – it’s all made a difference. I guess I’m hooked on the support, but for now that’s okay. For now I can let myself be supported.
And then, when this is over, I’ll do what I can to show my thanks.
One thought on “Making time”
That feeling that you get when you check the green bubble next to your parents’ names, I call it “anticipation”. Anticipation for something good… yup, it’s a great feeling!
I feel that way about your blog – wondering how you are doing, what piece of wisdom and information I’ll absorb, and what creative inspiration I’ll find from your art.
I just realized that that is the feeling that one of my cats must have when I come home. Jonah, my “ball of sunshine”, is happy when I come home because he has been waiting all day to go out and have me play with him in the back yard. It suddenly occured to me that I should make the time to play with him even though I may be tired or it may be cold outside.
Yup, Jonah is looking for my support. For him to continue being my “ball of sunshine”, I need to nurture his joy.