Category Archives: Life

My dad and his cake

Posted in Bumpboobs, Life, Love, Treatment by

My dad has a rightly earned spot of pride for his caramel cake. And on special occasions, occasions so special they celebrate the sweet tooth, he whips out this secret family recipe and struts his culinary skills.


And I mean secret. Only one person knows the recipe . . . guess who.

I can’t even remember if he’s offered to teach us. My father and I hold a rivalry in the kitchen. He claims to be the better cook. I – obviously – disagree. We had a cook off one year, and because he went first (it was a nice roast, granted) I was able to step up the game with a meal of buttered potatoes and I can’t remember what else (these potatoes were so good, that the rest of the night draws blank).

But when it comes to dessert I just can’t whip him. Sure, he always pulls out the caramel cake, but I’ve never countered with a better option.

So today Dad, for your birthday, I will concede this point: you make the better cake.

Happy birthday 🙂 Love you.

The great escape

Posted in Chemotherapy, Food, Treatment by

Sleep is peace and distance and rest. It is a vacation from worry. And when I wake up – no matter what stage in treatment – there are always a few moments where everything feels normal. I feel normal.

Last night I dreamt of a giant raspberry – it was about the size of a toque (or a beanie, for you non-Canadians). I peeled it from the stem; the smell was sharp, the feel fantastic, and it was wet with seams of juice. Have you ever looked inside a raspberry? The way the seeds and sacks all weave together? Well it was like that, only so large you could put it on your head. I thought – this would be the perfect hat.

Instead I made it into a pie.

Now that’s just a segment of my dream; it’s an example of the wonderful places a good night’s rest can take you. Sure, okay, there are bad dreams and they happen occasionally – but normally it’s a mixture of the fantastic and familiar (with a dash of action advenutre – though not the pie making, of course). The nausea and the anxiety get left behind.

I love the night time. It’s an excuse for me to relax. Last night I was asleep by 8.30pm. Gorgeous! It had been a long day filled with anxiety over eating and not eating, and drinking and not drinking, plus Zsolt’s crazy work place. But as soon as that clocked ticked over to 8.30 – click – lights out, hold my calls.

Time for a sleep vacation.

Long-distance Lunching

Posted in Bumpboobs, Chemotherapy, Love, Treatment by

Today we celebrated my grandmother’s 19th birthday. That’s right – not 91, but 19. My aunt made lunch, my dad made cake, and everyone gathered in the backyard to enjoy the weather. The family passed around food and we chatted about upcoming weddings, jobs, friends, pickles . . . it was an easy-going Saturday afternoon.

We celebrated, despite my being 5,378 km away. And though I couldn’t smell the barbequed quail, and  didn’t run indoors when the bees came, and couldn’t help extinguish any candles – I did talk with my grandmother, and sing happy birthday, and enjoy the company of my whole family.

Being away from home becomes easier with video chat. It isn’t the same as really being there, but it’s the next best thing.  Long distance relationships (couples, families, friends) have had a hand up since the arrival of email, then icq, then msn, and now skype.  I cannot imagine living this far from my family without being able to still see, talk and relax with them.

Next we need virtual hugs. Maybe the creators of google can get on that. Until then Zsolt can step in with a squeeze and a kiss. (not that I snog my parents, but you know I mean . . . besides, who wouldn’t want a big kiss from Zsolt? Except maybe his parents . . .)

Joyeux anniversaire, Lulu! Il était bon de vous revoir.