Better than 50%

On special request from my grandmother, Lulu, I will attempt to write more often.

alternative cancer treatmentShe put it to me quite nicely yesterday: “I don’t want to bother you, but I worry!”

Well don’t worry Lulu, because I am fine – Je suis tres bien aujourd’hui. J’ai travaille avec ma mere pour etre “okay” avec ma chimio, j’ai aussi commence a faire un menu pour que Zsolt puisse me faire de la nourriture quand je suis fatigue* – and I am writing.

I was just saying to my mother the other day, ‘Who are these people coping well with chemo?’ because I hear of them, but haven’t actually met any of them – nor have I see their blogs online.  So, that started the google search mission. Both she and Zsolt have managed to find stories where people cope with the treatment and do not suffer any treacherous side effects. Mind you, each chemo approach is different depending on the cancer. For instance, one lady had chemo every three to four weeks. I’ll be having chemo every two weeks, later followed by every week. However, I’m trying to ignore that side of their good news and focus on the positive stuff – people cope well, and are able to carry on with their lives.

And on that note, Mom found an interesting website. There was a little boy – three years old – who was diagnosed with a cancer that has a survival rate of about 3%. Now that’s scary. But his parents took it upon themselves to give him every fighting chance possible. Years later he is cancer free. His dad ensured that every possible option was explored – and while there was probably an element of miracle in his great recovery – watching this father speak was a source of inspiration for alternative ways I can better prepare and protect my body**.

But you see, it’s not that I want to turn away from the medical advice provided. The doctors I have worked with are very experienced, specialize in breast care, and know what they know. So that isn’t it. I’m still having the chemo. I’m still having the radiation. I’m still doing the hormones. But . . . I still want to do more. I want better than 50%.

A long time ago I worked for PWC, and while working there – during a purge of office clutter and clean up – I acquired several pads of PWC note paper. On every page of this notepad it reads: ‘Have I explored every angle?’

Apart from loving to have that sweet copywriting opportunity, I admire the statement.

Have I explored every angle? Not yet, but I’m trying. Today I went to the acupuncturist. In a few weeks I’ll start treatments. A while back my breast was removed. In the meanwhile I’m taking supplements. On top of that I’m lessening estrogen-encouraging food in my diet. Tomorrow I’m going to the shop and buying glass containers to replace my plastic Tupperware (though I do love my Tupperware). Tonight I’ll try to meditate. And all the while my air filter is running, getting rid of mould and mite crap from the air.

Why not fight from every angle, what’s so wrong about that? Nothing.  Not a thing.  Nada.

So, that’s encouraging.  🙂

* Thanks for translating, Mom.

** Watch Bobby’s father describe their efforts to beat cancer and reduce the side effects of chemo treatments. It’s broken into parts. Click here for Part one, Part two, Part three, Part four. You can also visit their website, where proceeds go toward supporting other children in a similar situation: http://www.bobbyshealthyshop.com/

Snuggie wars

Daniel and JP, my two thoughtful brothers, have bought me a Snuggie.

A ‘snuggie’ is a long fleece blanket with sleeves – totally ridiculous, but totally awesome. My snuggie is beige, and the sleeves are giant – they hang off my arms like Princess Leia in that white gown, and if I put a little effort in I can wrap the giant beige blanket around my body so it doesn’t trip me when I move.

Give me two hair buns and a lightsaber; I’ll start kicking some dark side ass.

Yeah Snuggie!

The schedule cometh

Today I received a letter from the hospital detailing my entire chemo schedule. I even know what chair I’ll be sitting in for each appointment, and the length of time I’ll be there for (1. 15 hour and 1.45 after switching medications). There are, in total, sixteen sessions with the last session arriving just before Christmas (December 10th, 2010). This means that maybe, just maybe, I’ll be making it home for Christmas this year. It’s an idea that warms my heart.

But before running off to Canada with wrapped presents in my arms (oh, I am looking forward to that day), there are several things that must be done before chemosizing my life.  Apart from visiting the local coffee shop while blatantly lacking a bra (and feeling damn good about it), I need to start Zsolt’s application for residence, find a wig, take a holiday, browse apartments and eventually visit the mastectomy store.

I’m very thankful for this time off from cancer. It’s been nice, and I think will continue to be nice. July 30th is ever looming, but the sooner it starts the sooner it is over. In the meantime I’ll just take a few deep breaths and keep calming myself down.